Oh men, you’re interesting creatures and we love you to bits, but sometimes you don’t half get on our nerves. Here we list the full repertoire of intensely irritating things that many men do, which truly get on women’s nerves. Get ready for a frank, to the point, and truly soul-cleansing moan about men:
Annoying male habit 1: Adjusting your private parts
The day that women discover the secret to a man’s love for fiddling with his private parts will be a joyous occasion. Surely that much scratching and re-adjusting can’t be good for you; why hasn’t someone invented a cure for this frustrating problem by now? The image of a man lying on the sofa with his manhood in one hand and a bag of... well, nuts in the other, certainly won’t make it into a list of women’s top 10 sexual fantasies any time soon. Whilst we understand you sometimes need to ‘sort the boys out’ for comfort purposes, at least do it while we’re not looking.
Annoying male habit 2: Selective hearing
Choosing to watch the television over listening to your other half is never going to end well because it’s insulting. Are women really that boring? Or do you only enjoy conversations about sex and food? Tuning in and out of conversations isn’t really an option; you’re either having a chat with us, or you aren’t. Maybe all conversations should take the form of ‘Sex. Please take the bin out’ or ‘Food. Can I have a cuddle?’ or maybe even ‘I’m naked. Your tea has been on the side for half an hour’. Please don’t make us do this.
Annoying male habit 3: Leaving a trail of mess
What is it with the male tendency to leave the story of their day behind in a long trail of mess like a storyboard? When we get home from work we don’t need to ask what you’ve been up to on your day off; we can see that you had a shower and a shave, played on your game, had lunch, played on a different game and then watched films. Is this a strategic trail that you leave behind so you can find your way back to the fridge? Or is it so you needn’t bother telling us about your day when we get home? Please enlighten us, and in the meantime, pick your mess up.